26 Feb, 2024

Victimhood Has Currency

By | February 26th, 2024|Collaborative Divorce, Divorce Agreements, Divorce Finance, Financial Planning|

Most people spin conflict so that they are the victor or the victim. Here’s why it’s important to keep that instinct in check. The legal community focuses heavily on the topic of domestic violence with continuing legal education seminars and pro bono clinics. There is even a specialized court called the IDV court (integrated domestic violence), where the family law cases that have alleged elements of domestic violence are adjudicated. Abuse comes in many forms - emotional, physical, sexual, and financial. Courts (more...)

19 May, 2023

Spouse or Competitor

By | May 19th, 2023|Collaborative Divorce, Divorce & Personality Disorder, Divorce Finance, Separation Agreements|

Over my career, I’ve seen many cases in which the parties act more like top-tier competitors as opposed to loving spouses and partners. This almost always causes one of them to feel badly about the relationship because they can’t help but compare their “worth” to their partner’s. They may feel like they’re always outwitted and somehow beaten by them.  Usually, dynamics like these involve two highly skilled and highly successful professionals. For example: A couple was running a medical practice together, and (more...)

10 Feb, 2023

Remedies for a Blabbing Spouse

By | February 10th, 2023|Collaborative Divorce, Divorce & Personality Disorder, Separation Agreements|

My last post explored the phenomenon of one spouse bad-mouthing the other spouse — to friends, neighbors and places of employment. In this post, we’ll address what you can do about it. There are a wide variety of strategies that can be used to, for lack of a better term, tell your ex to shut up. Specific legal remedies that can be put in place are:  •Confidentiality Clauses/Non-Disclosure Agreements: A party can negotiate confidentiality or privacy clauses. Unfortunately, these Agreements are very difficult (more...)

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